Color Wins in Massachusetts

By DP Fleming, D Pressing News Senior Reporter.

The fundamental color brown has won the Massachusetts special election for the Senate Seat formerly held by the late Ted Kennedy. The famous color, a well-known part of each American child's early education and mastered by most by Kindergarten, gained 52% of the vote, beating Democratic candidate Martha Coakley, a human being.

The win surprised many, as Massachusetts has long been considered a Democratic party stronghold for humans. The color brown was assisted by the number 41 and it´s gradual gains in preliminary polls led President Obama and Bill Clinton to make personal appearances in support of the homo sapien Coakley.

Because the democratic party lost the Massachusetts seat, they lose the super majority in the Senate, threatening the administration´s Healthcare reform plan. In its acceptance speech, the color brown pledged to oppose the plan by uniting other colors in the light spectrum beginning with red, white, and eventually persuading the elusive blue.