Thursday, April 15, 2010

Tea Party: No Longer for Dummies and Racists

By DP Fleming, D Pressing News Senior Reporter.

A recent New York Times poll of Tea Party supporters indicates that the majority of them are more intelligent and educated, wealthier, spiritually superior, healthier, and better looking than the general public.

Tea Party members oppose Obama's policies on the indisputable, self-evident, universally-recognized, absolute and God-certified truth that they aren't wrong. Contrary to the notion that they are racists, they smarty-pants-ists.

Unlike the public, 99% are concerned a family member will become unpatriotic or a republican, democrat or other dangerous thinker such as communist, fascist, tennis pro, hair stylist, or nail technician's assistant. Over 89% say the recession has caused them major hardships with math.

They feel apathy among voters has led to the current trouble in America, and plan to "git that thing called pathy and shoot it when we find it."

Most feel that Sarah Palin is as good as Oprah Winfrey any old day, and blame Congress for Bill Maher not the Bush Administration or David Letterman.

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