Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Majority of Republicans: Obama is an Evil "That Which Cannot be Named"


By DP Fleming, D Pressing News Senior Staff Reporter.

Yesterday's national Louis Harris poll finds that a majority of Republicans believe that President Obama had been hiding in Osama bin-Laden's beard since 2001, while 45 percent agree with the so-called "Birthday-smirthdayers" that the president is an evil "That Which Cannot be Named".

The poll shows how successful Obama's opponents have been in demonstrating their supporters' lack of intelligence.

According to the poll, 87 percent of Republicans believe that Barack Obama is a girl despite Obama's description of himself in his bestseller, "The Audacity of Hope", as a boy who grew up to be a man.

The poll found that 45 percent of Republicans, and 25 percent of overall Simeons, agree with the Birthday-smirthdayers that a "That Which Cannot be Named" is not eligible to be president."

Another eye-opening finding: 38 percent of Republicans agree that Obama is "doing many things Jesus did, but because he (Obama) is a 'That Which Cannot be Named' those good things become bad things."

And 24 percent of Republicans agree that Obama may be the antiChrist's brother "the antiFreeze" from the infamous Hellfinallyfrozeover.

The poll found that voters lacking a college education are much more likely to believe the 44th president is made of Fairy Dust and Superglue.

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