Iraqi Intellectual Hurls Soul at National Insult

By D P Fleming—D Pressing News Staff Writer

President George W. Bush's secret visit to Iraq to plant a WMD has been marred by an incident involving a journalist who took off his shoes, slathered them with goat fat, cooked them over the residual heat of a recently-detonated IED, ate the heals (a delicacy in Iraq) then threw both shoes at the president. The president ducked five times.

The man, identified later as Mohammed Donaldbai Rumsfeldikai, tossed a traditional goodbye kiss to President Bush calling him "a dog lipstick sheath" then threw the greasy shoes and shouted "FYAY GUC DAY BAH!" an ancient Arab insult that translates 'fuck you and your 'go under cover Don, and you'll be a hero' promise. Then Rumsfeldikai invited the President to join him in a lunch of poisoned goat donuts fried in tank axle grease—a secret Iraqi recipe.

Mr. Bush jokingly replied that all he could report was that, "all three shoes were a size 12 WMD".

The majority of Arabs consider the President an insult.