Bush Medal of Freedom “Not Funny”

By DP Fleming--D Pressing News Senior Staff Writer

Several leading logic organizations claimed that the decision by the Bush Administration to posthumously award the medal of freedom to deceased comedian Rodney Dangerfield is an affront to organizations dedicated to logic throughout the world.

A statement by the groups says “The comedian's humor, which includes such jokes as, 'I get no respect. My wife likes to talk during sex so she called me from a motel.' and 'My wife cut me down to once a month, but I don't care, she cut everybody else out completely.' are violations in logic and turn a blind eye to the freedom of millions of people who don't find the jokes funny,”.

In a drunken stupor, President Bush gave his reasons to award the honor. "Rodney gave me insight. For instance, Laura and I were happy for twenty years, then we met. I phoned her this morning and asked her if she remembered what I told her while we were making love last night and she said 'who is this?'."

In a meeting yesterday with Colombian President Alvaro Uribe, President Bush spit beer on Uribe's belly button when Bush pulled his pants off the Colombian chief executive's head. "He got all mad, so I said let's kiss and make up. He said okay and bent over. Hilarious," said the President.