The US Supreme Court has finally decided that marijuana and other harmless but really cool drugs obtained through illegal searches may be used to execute defendants.
The highest court in the nation ruled against a rule which regulates a regulation that monitors a rule that requires evidence to be regulated and suppressed if it is obtained from a species of animal lower than a rhesus monkey, an otter, or from the scientifically unclassifiable, yet prevalent crack cocaine dealer.
By this ruling, the Court has rolled American law back to a time when, according to President Bush's core constituency, men rode woolly mammoths to prayer meetings and God charged a reasonable price to enter the zoo at the Garden of Eden.
Justice Ruth B. Ginsburg, citing many logical errors in the court's decision, took a hit on a bong and wrote "Dude, the most serious impact of the court’s decision will be on innocent people, man. People wrongfully arrested based on information from an otter or a...whatever, I lost my train of thought, oh yeah, some animals and shit. This is 4th amendment violations here. I mean, there were some chips and soda and a lighter around here someplace."