By DP Fleming--D Pressing News Staff Writer
Bill Richardson withdrew his bid to become commerce secretary because of an anal probe he received during a brief, yet close encounter on his way to Santa Fe last summer. Sources say Richardson is concerned he will be found insane and does not wish to embarrass president-elect Obama.
According to an unknown source claiming to be human, D Pressing News has learned that a New Mexico airport won a contract for a landing strip worth 15 million dollars.
Aides from both camps tell reporters that Richardson had been planning a trip to Umf, a previously unknown planet in our solar system, for some time now. Obama did not urge Richardson to make the interplanetary trip.
A company, Interplanetary Trips Inc. or IPT, and its CEO, Mr. Zonzptznzp Erntznarz Oopzabbl Mnztqnx Zisskl Ummll Umnm Enk Nz Q Junior, contributed large sums of money to Richardson's PACS, including one donation of 0.004 Umfian iqs or $74,000.00 USD.
The contribution was several months after IPT won the interplanetary contract. Richardson is the most prominent Hispanic in the DNC and now the galaxy.